sorry i ghosted you…I went to find my soul in Seoul 🇰🇷 why I solo travel + self discovery 💎 GemTime

Hey friends, welcome to GemTime. If you are new here, my name is Jemima and GemTime is the unfiltered section of this channel. It includes weekly vlogs, challenges and other chill catch up style formants. Today we are having a sit down because I ghosted you guys and I’m really sorry, but I can explain a lot has been happening. 

I spontaneously went to South Korea for Spring Time and I have a lot to say and show y’all. We’re calling this trip chasing Cherry Blossoms. But, before I get into the vlogs, I need to rewind a little bit, so that the present makes sense and also it gives direction for where the future is heading. This will explain the inconsistency with my Youtube content, and where my head has been really. My self discovery journey.

I just want to talk about why South Korea has been so heavy on my heart and the significance of this trip. My closest ones know I am always talking about visiting Asia, with Japan and South Korea being the favourites because I missed them so much. 

My first solo trip was to Japan in November 2018, and when I say it saved my life I’m not exaggerating; I’m taking 2018 with me to the grave I can’t talk about that shit. Then in 2019 I went on my second solo trip and visited South Korea. Because I was in a better head space that trip literally felt like I was walking on clouds. I was too excited and I needed to go back asap.

I was meant to go to Korea in March 2020, I had booked the trip in December of 2019. I had a lot of expectations. The plan was to go early and stay for a week to experience Spring time because my previous trip in November was a little cold. 

Like many people around the world I had to confront my broken dreams and keep it moving with life. My trip to South Korea got cancelled, and I lost some money and vision. I thought I would begin my adventure era, but continued my stay home and do nothing sage. I was lost and confused but in those moments I did find another interest, which turned into a passion and then became my new dream. Jemima’s Outcome. 

Something that was just to kill time, became something I wanted to do well at, and learn about and grow in it. The more I spent time creating, the more I could create and other opportunities opened up to me. For example, my love for writing and publishing books, as well as starting a business to connect with others. This journey has had it’s ups and downs, but overall it has been so fulfilling and I genuinely felt like I had purpose. From the start of 2020 up until June 2022 this was everything to me and I could have been happy to continue to live in my Jemima’s Outcome bubble.

Yet the world was opening up again fully.

And in June 2022, Diana and I went to Italy for a few days for our friend Joshua’s wedding. There is a series about it, check that out if you haven’t. Milan was eventful, there was just too many things overstimulating me. From being in another county for the first time in 2 and a half years, as well as seeing my secondary school crush, like damn why is the boy still fine. 

Honestly, things started to feel different by the end of summer, and I thought it was just burn out. I took my break and I came back. But I couldn’t carry on like before still. 

November 2022, I decided to I write another short book, and get myself motivated again by force. 

After I published, my laptop crashed, and so I could not do any book promotions. It was like the straw that broke the camels back and I was so done with things going wrong. Remember, purpose is not an easy ride and as much as I loved it, I equalled struggled to find the strength to move forward sometimes. 

Luckily, I had a holiday to Portugal planned for December 2022. I was planning to film lots and have vlogs, but the laptop incident depressed me and I just wanted space to breathe and think.

I fell in love with Portimao, this was my first beach holiday in years. Being by the water literally filled my cup right to the top again. And now I’m one of those people who loves long walks by the beach. I went with my sister and nephew, and all we did was chill by the beach. The weather wasn’t hot or anything, it was just so calming seeing all that vastness of water and realising how small I am in such a huge world. I really wanted to swim, I wanted to wash myself anew and have a little baptism, but it was far too cold. 

Coming back to London after that trip I was expectant again, and I ended that year on a pretty high note; including seeing JAY B live, such a sexy human.

The start of 2023 I was hopefully, I made a vision board and I was ready to work and get things done. I got a pretty new MacBook Air and I said let’s do this. But I didn’t do anything. I would plan videos, and not film them. Then the footages I did have from the past I couldn’t remember how I wanted to edit them. Basically, I was frustrated and I knew I wanted change and produce better quality content but I didn’t know how to do it. I just had major creative block. 

By the start of February I was feeling sad, and crying a lot from stress. I woke up on a normal Thursday and I was like I need to get outta here. But I didn’t need another holiday, I just got back from Portugal. I needed more, I had to go to Asia. 

See I told myself when I left Seoul in November 2019 “I would be back soon”. South Korea had been opened for awhile, but I didn’t feel like I was ready to go because I wanted to hit certain targets first. I forgot I put my heart on pause back then. And everything I have been doing was making do, was second place to what I really wanted.  

By that Thursday night I was certain I had to go back Korea, and I thought I miss Japan too and I’m in a better head space let me visit there as well. I got excited about spring time and maybe seeing some cherry blossoms in Japan. I looked at my calendar and decided two weeks that will be end of March to the start of April to hopefully catch some early blossoms. 

Friday the 10th February, I woke up early and booked my flight to Korea. I was going to leave March 21st, in 1 month and 11 days. This was impulsive, spontaneous, random, but I had been saying I would do it, just been too scared. That whole day I was just in a daze, it didn’t feel real and it continued to feel surreal right up until I got into the plane.

Initially I wanted to do 1 week traveling in Korea then 1 week in Japan. However, while I was planning and looking at documents and accommodation, Japan was just stretching my budget too much and I had to give it a pass. I was disappointed because I wanted cherry blossoms in Kyoto, but I said cherry blossoms in Busan will still be amazing and a dream. 

Here was the new plan by March, I would do two weeks travelling around South Korea. And I knew it would be enough. It was time to press play on my life. I was heading to soul to find my Seoul. 

And yeah we will begin that journey in the next video chasing cherry blossoms.

If you made it to the end of the video, I appreciate you taking the time get to know me and slow things down a little. In order to avoid only posting highlight reels I need to have these moments where I just share my truth. So thank you for listening.

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